I stopped looking for bracelets. They are gone now. But I found a big snail, spiderwebs, flowers and stepped on the jaw bone of a hog with horns and teeth. I imagine the artifacts of my childhood, ancestry, career, loves and motherhood shedding as I wend along the path that I can’t see clearly yet. - I’m bushwhacking. I’m crawling under boughs, getting scratches on ankles from prickly flowers and losing my sense of direction. I fall down sometimes, the hedge impenetrable - I concede to nature. I cannot pass right now. There is no clear path yet. Lie down and rest. So I do - reluctantly. I have to laugh. And I like it.

First stop is Ohau - Malaekahana Beach Campground.

A mental note to come back one day

with my kids

for that campfire, disconnection from mainstream life, boogie boarding

and that green curry on rice.

After a 30 plus year career in health care sustainability, I have resigned from my current employment, where I have been for 18 years. My last day of work is January 7, 2022. Holding on tight to past events is part of my safety strategy. I am mentally prying things out of my clenches - finger by finger and letting go. I’m cutting energetic cords. I focus on my breath, trying to look forward and not back.

Fear is her resting place - her baseline.

With the cleansing of tears streaming and nose running, I was cutting, pulling, ripping, and dragging -- revealing a path that was easier to see, easier to navigate and easier to follow – now that the blocks were removed – a pathway to the heart – to home - to myself.

This warrior’s armor is an aura.

With roots coming out of its feet.

Flowers and leaves in its hair.

A song floating from its lips.