Grasshopper Lessons

I went on a vision quest in March 2022 in Hawaii. Here is an excerpt from my notes, “I felt a tingling on my toes and when inspected, found grasshoppers nibbling on them. It did not hurt - but I could feel it and I did not brush them away. This continued throughout the vision quest. One time, I stayed perfectly still as a grasshopper traveled across my ear, across my closed eye, and my nose, while I silently prayed that it would not enter my nostril. It did not. I let it pass on by - across my face and then ‘hop” - it was gone.’

Pondering the Grasshopper

Things come and they go.

Onto other things.

No one is right or wrong.

Good or bad.

They alight on the toe,

Pause.

And then jump into the grass,

and never will be seen again.

This is hard for me.

I cried when the grasshopper left me.

Why is it hard?

It leaves me alone - by myself,

to figure things out.

New things require new strategies,

and it has taken time to master right now.

How does one master something different,

when right now takes so much effort?

Adjustment. Flexibility.

When one does not feel safe,

it is harder to adjust,

when teetering on a floating piece of wood,

Not feeling on solid ground.

We are adjusting in that one place,

and adding to it,

Creates turbulence.

Leaving,

reminds,

that we have to adjust again,

by ourselves.

Sometimes,

feels hard,

to navigate

solo.

Accept impermanence,

breathe in and breathe out.

I will never have that breath again,

See that grasshopper again,

have that relationship again,

that baby again,

that job again,

that cat again,

Impermanence.